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Archive for February, 2008

Bowling for Beauties

The opening of the “Kegelstatt” trio is unusual: unusual enough that it obtained a (probably) spurious nickname. And yet, at the same time, there is nothing revolutionary in there. It is the usual classical bag o’tricks: dialectical, question-and-answer fragment-phrases, moving from tonic to dominant to tonic etc. etc. Then, predictably, there are two paired, longer phrases: one with a deceptive cadence, one with a full cadence … from the point of view of construction, there is absolute tedium, just Generic Structure, nothing to see. (And the more you describe it in these terms, the less you may see.)

The nickname “Kegelstatt” derives from something unusual in the material itself, not the phrase construction (though I mostly distrust distinctions between form and content). Here’s the famous motive …
bowlingmotive.jpg

… a strong tonic note (foundation), a turn (ornament, fancy), a downward arpeggio (tail, conclusion), also in the tonic. The bowling image is—whew!—not totally idiotic. It works, as would any metaphor with an initial attack or impulse, followed by a kind of helpless release: anything with consequences that fall away. These consequences are not willed, made, or manipulated; they are to be heard as “just” the result of the mozartbowling.jpgfirst note, the result of musical physics.

An ornamented tonic arpeggio is really the most boring, conventional way to begin a classical work, or any work; why is this arpeggio special? If I think closely about what in the motive appeals to me, about how it “feels” to play it, when I am playing it well (IF I am ever playing it well), it has something to do with the downward passage of the four last notes, the sense of passing. It’s as if, while blowing, you pulled out a valve on a horn, smoothly, evenly, and the various notes of E-flat are touched on their way down, in a gliding motion. Though you hear the individual notes of the E-flat triad, what you feel is the smooth gliding of the valve.

One of the crucial aspects of Mozart’s exploration of our audible frequencies is his ability to imbue just a simple, expectable arpeggio with a special, sensual quality, a quality somewhat at odds with functionality. Of course, everything functions. Everything functions, in fact, as it should, in “textbook” fashion, even—your Theory Teacher can show you how it’s done but could never do it—with perfect, well-versed voice-leading (to say the least). This perfect functioning is a kind of innocence at the end of exhaustive knowledge. (Innocence figures prominently in Mozart’s iconography: Mozart the child genius, the gift from God, music written in heavenly script and only transcribed by its human conduit …) Every note, every motive, every moment can say: I’m “just” an arpeggio; or, I’m “just” the tonic headed to the dominant; I pass from here to there, filling this space … It shows its workings transparently; you can write flawless harmonic analyses till the cows come home. And yet against this innocence, I hear other qualities, unexpected searing beauties tucked away in the nooks and crannies of the tonal system, which rub against the grain of the tonal system even as they function within it. These sensual qualities (or “qualia” in philosophical speak) are the truly subversive parts: just the sound of a certain arpeggio framed a certain way; the timbre of an instrument coloring a particular voice; anything at all. The uniqueness of the moment finds a way to protest the generic tendencies of the construction. Beauty subverts functioning.

(This last sentence has been proven in my life 3,793,421 times; the last time was just yesterday, when Cory called me at 3 in the morning to explain that he was following two beautiful 18 year old girls, and had found himself inexplicably in their company at a McDonalds—McDonalds! I did not answer the phone but woke up nonetheless and then found myself stumbling over to my phone which was charging against the wall and listening to his voicemail and then sleeping very intermittently until 7 when I decided to get up once and for all, super grumpy. Cory, meanwhile had 7 hours of rehearsal and a 3 hour drive the next day, and when contacted by phone seemed a bit turgid or sluggish in temperament; I, too, found myself often staring at a sock on my floor, simultaneously langorous and bitter, and incapable of will. Thus, the beauty of the two girls—which I did not even witness!—passed, like a virus, through Cory to me and impeded both of our functionings. Astounding.)

This subversive beauty could be attributed to certain parameters: the octave G down to G, transected by two thirds and a fourth, a registral shift, also the fact that the chord is E-flat at the 1st inversion, the notes at the beginning and end are not “stable” notes … all of these factors sound like scientific indicators of “why” this moment, this motive has a certain quality. Only by playing the passage a number of times, by caressing these parameters, by exerting your imagination upon them in fits and starts, would you arrive at some cogent realization of its qualia for you: what it is, after all, you hear “in it.”

I said already, and let me lay heartless words upon heartless words: it has something to do for me with the relationships of the notes, with the instability of the Gs at either side of the arpeggio, the G passing down to its octave lower compatriot, neither of which a true stopping point, both of which provisional, but opening up a registral space, a triadic configuration, for contemplation.

“Opening up a triadic configuration” does not sound very beautiful, does it?

What does it open into? After the last pin falls, there is silence. The phrase fades, falls into four eighth notes of nothingness. It is in this silence, perhaps, that one truly “hears” the motive that was just played. Hmm. You can use that time to reflect on the qualia of the preceding notes, which we have just slavishly buried under a mountain of words.

The opening of this piece is, in fact, stacked heavily with silences; Mozart wants us to hear, rehear, expect, wait. (Our acts of hearing and waiting are “built into” the structure.) I said the piece begins by opening up a registral space; I might metaphorically extend that; it’s like the piece opens its mouth, as if to sing … The bowling motive “functions” (forgive me) as a kind of musical yawning … Yawning is suggestive, because once the jaw drops (G-Eb-Bb-G), nothing comes out … or, more precisely… you are waiting for something and (after a calculated, exasperating pause) what comes out is impish, courtly, flirtatious, a bit glib:

glibresponse.jpg

Charming: perhaps a bit funnier, lighter than you would have expected from the opening idea, but thereby playing the dialectical, paradoxical games of the classical style. This second idea also (like the first) closes with a kind of opening. Its concluding grace notes are wonderful, like a last-minute flip, a wondering and upturning smile. It would seem the piece is beginning to take shape. But after the smile, we have yet more silence; the measure goes by while the smile freezes upon your face.

By the time we hear the bowling motive again, if you’re not clueless, you have figured out that Mozart is positing a kind of peculiarly slow rhythm of happenings. Actually, the construction, the template, is fine. 2 bars and 2 bars, etcetera, etcetera. But the material is too short! It ends way before its time and we simply have to wait around till the arriving barline prompts us. Why would Mozart deliberately write material that does not fill the space?

Mozart’s no fan of extra effort. He does the simplest thing; he creates space in order to fill it, in order to reveal the miracle of continuity. He forces you to listen to the silences; this (slightly perverse) act then rebounds and makes you re-comprehend something you would normally take for granted: the line of a phrase. The clarinet appears and soars:

amazingphrase.jpg

Harmonically, this is (again) nothing special, I-IV-V-I. You can pick it up by the bushelful at the Classical WalMart. What special quality, what qualia, does Mozart manage to affix to this most prosaic of constructions? Well, the answer is quite simple, sensual, basic: the continuity depends upon, our attention is drawn to, the breath of the clarinetist, a miracle (life itself). Mozart makes us hear breath. We had such long spaces for breath before, even: too much time to breathe, to get ready for the next phrase, a series of overlong pickups or misfired cues. All those breaths, those rests, those baited breaths, while fragmentary phrases waited for their futures … all of that just to hear the clarinetist breathe once, simply, out. The sing-song, the see-saw, the tit-for-tat, all condense into a singularity. Logic and dialectic give way to air.

Afterthought. The outlining notes of the clarinet melody are:
laterdescendingnotes.jpg

Sound familiar? It’s a transposed version of our earlier arpeggio:
originaldescendingnotes.jpg

… i.e. the “breathing-out” of the first phrase. If you think that this resemblance is a coincidence, you’re an idiot. (I’ve been watching too much House.) The short, quick exhale of the opening motive is magnified 6 times over; it becomes the tremendous redemptive descent of the new theme: a breath which finds its groove, its deeper meaning.

Actually, I lied. (Again, too much House.) The clarinet does not play the entire arpeggio. It plays the first three notes:
interrupteddescent.jpg
and then the piano “interrupts” it, takes the last note, stealing the clarinet’s destined conclusion:

interruptionitself.jpg

(I love the silence there, the wicked sixteenth-note rest in the clarinet part, just at the last moment, the fulfilling moment.)

… and you didn’t believe me when I said timbre was subversive! Mozart has visited us again with functional, whispered, sweet-nothings. That chord is just plain yummy, partly because it is stolen; the pianist’s intervention here is an unexpected beauty, a joyous theft, coinciding with the deceptive cadence (harmonic deception=timbral deception) … a little zing, a bait-and-switch beneath the seamless perfection of the whole. It’s not the sort of thing you’d read about in any theory textbook, probably: it’s too dangerously like life, like the strange, hidden switches behind events, coursing coincidences, qualities or impulses that wake us up at 3 in the morning, and are endlessly hard to explain.

Partying for Sir Edward

Readers, you missed it. There’s never been a more uproarious assemblage of Elgar specialists than Sunday night, around 8, at Bard’s Spiegeltent.

I was in full end-of-summer celebration mode. I made my way expeditiously to the sangria counter—where little Elgar expertise was in evidence—but after two glasses, I still couldn’t get the Herbert Howells Piano Quartet out of my head. (It’s not that bad!) Additionally, memories of the reverent Dream of Gerontius in Gehryland were waging a pitched battle with the down-and-dirty Slavonic band playing in the mirrored tent: dialectical, diabolically different worldviews taunting each other across the lawn of my mind, while mother Nature relaxed into night, gazed calmly on. In the Elgar, death is the window onto harp-strewn, chordal heaven; but the Slavonic band, stuffed to the accordion’s gills with death, proposed no post-mortem.

I was alive. Neither musical answer seemed relevant to the question of now.

Even during the concert, Elgar’s vision of death did not sit absolutely well with me. I kept craving Mahler’s 9th Symphony, for example: something really despairing and not so comforting. Maybe it was the words? Death seemed awfully verbose. But then Mahler was not exactly concise.

What’s a party? You need some sentient beings looking for less sentience (a “sentience reprieve”); then there are inanimate requirements: beverages, snacks, tables, chairs, space to walk around, air to breathe. I wandered about the party for a bit like a camera; I was just there (essentially alone) to take snapshots. Tables scattered on the lawn, lights, clusters of people, each a bubble with its own modes of communication, each conversation part of some great tradition of party conversations, some well-worn path …

At some point I made the transition from seeing to feeling. I talked too freely, on subjects which were somewhat taboo. I tried, but I couldn’t quite read my own freedom on the faces of others. The True Party, perhaps, would be the breaking of every taboo, the yielding of every secret, the confession of every desire. After this hypothetical Ideal Party, in the grey light of the following morning, the only option would be drastic … some enveloping oblivion. A movie I have always loved is The Party, with Peter Sellers. It begins as a typical elite Hollywood gathering; everyone is having the usual chitchat; the roles are circumscribed; but Sellers is the renegade, the divine idiot who steps in and destroys virtually everything. This escalating destruction is the party’s success, of course; pleasure and destruction are related; a party planner is an oxymoron. The saddest thing in the world is the sour person at a party who glances at their watch and says “honey, isn’t it about time we go home?”

Elgar’s sense of death was very communal, oddly party-esque. As Gerontious is dying, he has a whole chorus of people to help him on, encourage him … The message is: we are all in this together. I like that. But Mahler, in good old number 9, with still a very large orchestra on stage, suggests the opposite: that we are all in it alone. Even (especially) in a crowd. A vast assemblage of musicians contrived to depict the ultimate savage solitude of the human condition. I like that too.

I found myself in a few unusual, unpredicted conversations. A man still in his tuxedo, with his tie untied poetically around his neck, seemed iconic, a relic of some party long ago. I consulted my brain: the Howells was still in there, sifting around; I sang a few diatonic tunes to myself, channeling my inner Brit. I ignored whatever music was playing. What was time?

There was a last dance. Just a few of us jumped around in the circle, exchanging glances here and there, exchanging coded meanings which we would later decipher, knowing we were the last ones, closing up shop. Each of us, I feel sure, was closing something different, something of our own, something for which this party was just a symbol. How profound! I laughed at myself constructing elaborate symbolic frameworks, enjoyed that too.

Then, by common consent, time was agreeably up. (The music ended.) We exited onto a quiet lawn. There were too few of us and there was too much night; we were dissolved in it. Occasional streetlights: paths curving off into the waiting campus: but mostly wonderful, friendly summer darkness. We’ve all seen this scene before, but don’t we love it, doesn’t it just send us to a wistful planet? The partiers dispersed, in twos threes fours, loudly or quietly: they dispersed into the night. Laughter echoed … nasal snippets of exclamations … in every direction diminuendo to nothing, thoughts expressed now far away, now part of the background hum of the world. In some dorm room somewhere someone was telling someone they loved them.

My own, undirected happiness took a walk into the night sky.

Hammerklavier in the Hamptons?

Is it better to know what you want, or not?  Do you want to see them (your desires) from afar, or do you want them to sneak up behind you like villains in a horror flick?  … they’d creep and approach on silent feet, grab you, wrap a vise arm around your neck … you’re a goner … but at that last moment (hopefully) they’d decide to shower you with bliss instead of slitting your throat.

I was on the plane, in a practical mood.  I couldn’t look my desires in the face, so I wrote them down in a notebook.  First, I wrote:

MY DESIRES

… all in caps, like that … and then, neatly, with a strange smugness, double-spacing, I wrote little 1)’s and 2)’s and 3)’s, figuring I had at least three desires, and I could add more if I desired.  (#4 is the desire to have more desires.  #5 is the desire to have less.)  Then next to these well-spread numbers I wrote down a bunch of things; they seemed reasonable, even a bit iconic; this was all too easy.  I put the pen down, firmly, with a deluded air of organization and completion, like a Martha Stewart of the soul, and glared for many minutes at the seat back’s encased television in map mode, telling me where I was, how many feet in the air, etc. etc.  My eyes focused on Montana, the current probable residence of an ex.  Desires unaccounted for.  I thought about adding something to the list, but …

That’s that, I thought.  It’s settled, it’s on paper.

Just the day before I had been sitting at a beautiful rectangular pool, looking down its bluish length in the company of many others in bathing suits, stretching their lengths out for the sun’s perusal.  A hot Hamptons day was slowly heading for its apex.

Let me explain, from my beach chair, that I had awoken with difficulty.  Whatever I had eaten for dinner had made complex demands.  (We had signed no preprandial agreement.)  No, no! my subsconscious protested all night, I cannot deal with that, I have things to do, more important things, but my dinner said well, we’ll see about that, and now I will take the form of the opening cadenza of the “Emperor” Concerto and torment you until you submit haha!  My subconscious is not as submissive as I would like it to be.  Sure enough, it ended up as full-out war, with poor me like a refugee caught up in the senseless violence, and as the battle reached its fever pitch, I was dreaming at 4 am of standing onstage during an “Emperor” concerto performance, eating Pho.  (The Pho was delicious.)  I believe I was also supposed to prepare some Pho on a small hotplate while playing the concerto.

Blear.  Fog.  Parched mouth.  9 am.   I stumbled around my room in half-light and tripped over every piece of clothing that I owned (since these were conveniently sprinkled around the carpet like floppy sculptures in a sculpture park) and made my way to the bathroom and nearly died in there due to various dangerous fixtures and whatnot and towels and other menacing creatures like leaky toothpaste tubes, and, so you see, it was nearly miraculous that I got up the stairs to the dining area of the house.  There I saw something I could not fathom or believe.

12 people, mostly in white, sat around the breakfast table.   Their hairstyles bespoke no haste; not a strand seemed even to waver in the breeze wafting in through the screen door from the huddled and massed hydrangeas, dotting the green unflawed lawn.

“Good morning!” one of them said.  “We just got back from a bike ride.”

“It’s a beautiful morning out there!” another offered.

I looked in vain for sweat or strain.  I tried not to look bitter.  A young man, meanwhile, offered me cinnamon toast.  I took it, hoping for no further information exchanges.

After some minutes of this, listening to the musical crunch of lowfat cereals in the many mouths around me, I felt I needed to retreat to the pool.  I filled two cups of coffee (I contemplated stealing the whole carafe) and excused myself.

Indeed: the pool was a solitary spot for some time and I was able to pull myself together, more or less.  I dispelled Pho phantoms.  But then others felt the pool urge and came to join me.  I chatted about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness with two fellows, who were hairstylists and quite nice, but clearly had quite a bit of stress about picking up their dogs from various spots along the Long Island coastline.  Eventually they had to leave and gather a spaniel in Easthampton, a labradoodle in Great Neck.   And so I found myself in the remaining company:  5 people between the ages of 16 and 21.  They were discussing Harry Potter.

“Do Ron and Hermione end up together?” one girl of 17 asked.

L, the eldest, answered.  She is 21 and indisputably, amazingly beautiful. She stood statuesque, tan, in her bikini, dripping, half in the pool, half out.

“No,” she said simply. “Hermione’s too pretty for Ron.”

L’s boyfriend, sitting not far away on the edge of the pool, looked a bit sour.   Around us invisible mansions nestled in their landscaped swaths of green.

“Does Harry find other girlfriends?” another asked, eagerly …

That’s it, I thought, I’m outta here.  I fled back into the house, and found myself almost running past the bustling dining table towards the piano, smiling but not stopping.  The table was surrounded by amiable people reading the papers, mostly the business sections… I leapt into my business … Bach.  This felt good, but not quite good enough.  Too ordered, too polite.  Hmm, I wondered, Jeremy, do you still remember the “Hammerklavier” fugue?  And so there I went for it, with full fever and fervor, looking out the window with something like antipathy at the perfect day, the perfect setting, the pond glistening in the distance, the blue marsh flowers, and it was certainly a crazy version of the fugue.   I went totally nuts.  I felt I had to fight my surroundings in some way.   The house’s open design meant the sound carried everywhere, and it certainly reverberated fantastically in the enormous foyer, where the piano was, up the stairs and around the skylight …  Beethoven was my ally against cleanliness, even, perhaps, against certain flavors of happiness; he growled and whirled and flew.   I got to the end, played the last B-flat major chord, removed it slightly abruptly, and waited, delighted, enlivened, frenzied, quivering.

The house was eerily quiet.

I padded back over to the dining table.  There was no one.  Nothing.  The house was completely empty.  The Wall Street Journal sat lonely upon the table, in pieces.  I had driven them all away.

Concision

My dear friend E was having dinner with a friend of hers last night—a woman who some years back had had a stroke. This woman is well recovered now, but described an interesting phenomenon. When she woke up from the stroke, she had only three words at her disposal:

1) Peter, the name of her son;

2) Chicken, for undisclosed reasons; and

3) a four-letter word beginning with “F” which I cannot print here, really;

Now, a stroke is nothing to laugh at, but apparently this woman found some interest and humor in the three words she was left with, seedlings from which she regrew the English language. And the words do seem to survey a spectrum of experience, even if one really would prefer not to construct a sentence out of them.

It got me to thinking: if I had only three words, if I could only speak three words, which would I choose? I meditated over my darkly brewed Blue Bottle Coffee. After a few minutes, it seemed clear:

1) Venti;

2) Condom;

3) Risotto

… the first simply so I could demonstrate to the uncaring world of Starbucks the correct pronunciation; the second being a plea for responsibility in the modern world, and hypothetically useful for other situations; and finally number three is for lunches and dinners. I’d be forced to resort to gestures for breakfasts but I’m not so talkative in the morning anyway.

My friend Cory, ever the pragmatist, hesitated not at all; he chose his three words with tremendous alacrity:

1) I (so narcissistic!);

2) Can’t;

3) Talk

… which, if it doesn’t really get you any farther than you started, at least gets you out of a great many awkward social situations (which may be what any of us really wants out of life, anyway!)

What would your 3 words be? I eagerly await submissions.

My friend Cory also feels, by the way, that this entire post is utterly tasteless, and beneath contempt. True: stroke victims cannot choose their words. But I suggest we should use humor to transcend the tragic and to contemplate the limitations and powers of language. Sometimes, with 186,000 words at our disposal, it would be better if we only had 3. I am sure regular readers of Think Denk will wholeheartedly agree.

Cory’s such a stick in the mud.